If like me you struggle with softening your hands before a jump but without going mad and dropping the horse in front of the fence then keep patting the horse ( I tend to tap the neck with a finger as does the same job) with your inside rein as you approach the jump. This will make sure the horse is steady into the outside rein, engaged as you have to use your legs and most important they stay soft in the contact. This is ideal for a horse who takes a hold into the fence or who tends to tense.
About the author
An amateur rider who produces all her own horses. I have competed at novice level and sadly never got further due to bad luck with horses but I am still ambitious to achieve a lot more. I have a riding qualification in UKCC2 and a diploma in NLP. Sports science and particularly the mental game fascinates me. For a day job I work for a large multinational brand.